Fat Journal 24 March 2018 - Milestone

Current weight: 66.9 kg

I finally hit the number 66 after a few months being more than 68 and over. Last I remember weighing 66 was I was back from Tasmania. Although that was an even number. I now weigh (as of this morning) 0.9 kg more.

It has been getting harder this thing with yesterday being the hardest by far. Mak cooked her never-disappoint chicken rendang and bubur jagung. I almost lost it I swear. I was like damnit why Mak ? Why ? And after me getting her to promise to never cook my favorite meals during this period and she did this! *insert crying emoji*

So yeah its getting fucking harder.

Shit, I remember being all excited before I start off last week. Now I know why I dread this shit so much in the first place. Coz it fucking sucks. The sugar craving. The cooking.

Damn. The cooking.

I'm enjoying the fact that with this diet regime I'm kinda forced to cook my own food and that somewhat gives me an insight to myself coz I never thought I had it. Well I don't had had it. Meals cooked by me are far from what you'd call nice even in moms' lazy days. But hey its edible and best of all is I know all the ingredients and I possess controls over its freshness.

Having to woke up somewhat early to prepare for the food is a fucking bother.

What else.

I know now I'm such a noob to actually be looking forward to this thing before I started last Monday. I was preoccupied with the destination and I fucking forgot that the journey is the hardest.

But I prevailed yesterday (and God was it hard, you dunno what its like to actually decline Mak's rendangs). So this looks, God willing, to be something I could persevere with. Something that I can at least see through the end (at least until I hit my ideal weight) or more. Something that I can actually finish for a while.

I'm a fucking starter but rarely do I finish.

Fat Journal 21 March 2018

Current weight: 68.5 kg

Started at 70.2 kilos on Monday (weekend weight lol) even though I mentioned 69 something during the first log.

Monday was all cream cheese day. Breakfast, lunch and dinner. Plus one 2 cup of decaf Nescafe (morning and night). 

I found out that Splenda is fucking superb. Not too much of an aftertaste like Stevia and definitely a lot sweeter.

Since first day was all cream cheese, naturally I had a craving yesterday and I swear I'll get that bread even if its the last thing I do. So as soon as I get home I roasted the flaxseed and couldn't find any patience in the process and thus I use a somewhat strong to moderate fires and my flaxseed smelt burnt. lol. But my sister tasted and she said its fine.

Then I get to grinding until it somewhat becomes something of a flour.

So the next thing is dough up the thing.

First try (yeah there's a second)

3 eggs

3 packs of splenda

15-17 gm of butter

A teaspoon of sodium bicarbonate

Half a spoon of vanilla essence

2-3 spoon of Psyllium husk

I was too lazy to bring down the oven and the airfyer was much too small for the mold I decided to use. So instead I put it in the microwave and since the microwave doesn't have any degree of control toward the temperature I decided to just go with it albeit using the same timing (22 minutes) suggested for oven cook.

Almost burned my mom's microwave. The whole house was covered in smokes. My God.

So I toss the pan and fry an egg sunny side up and wrap a cheese a la burito lah sangat pada hal frustrated that my first attempt at bread could seriously injure someone if thrown in high velocity. I could have hammered a nail with it.

So this around, the hunger pang somewhat subsided by my Burito Bodoh. I tried it, looking more properly this time.

Rupanya mamat yang tulis recipe tu ada bagi measurement but he left it at the end of his recipe. What a prick.

So this time around I tried it with a proper measurement

10 teaspoon of ground flaxseed (he suggested 16 but flat so I dunno)

4 eggs

15 gm of butter

A pinch of salt (tadi tak masuk punya lapaq tak perasan)

A teaspoon of vanilla essence

4 teaspoon of Psyllium husk

1 teaspoon of sodium bicarbonate

5 packs of splenda (he suggested 10 stevia but since splenda is splendid enough so yeah)

I put the dough in the magic pan and the result is quite satisfactory although it ended being somewhat sweet due to significant scent of the vanilla essence.

Next batch I will try to reduce the vanilla essence and play around with a little bit more salt and maybe bake the thing longer. ALSO, make it thinner its so fucking thick it barely fits the toaster.

Next: Salmon chapter. Too fucking lazy to type.

Fat Journal

Monday March 19, 2018 I will be starting my weight loss journey again. I currently weigh as of this morning 69.5 KG - an increase of 5.5 kilos from Raya. lol. Though unavoidable hospital admissions and ever increasing injuries have played a part - I have been pigging out like a - you guessed it, a Fakhrol.

So now I'm starting this again. 

Half Keto half Atkins.

If I manage to bring my weight down to 64 (ideally 63) I will get myself a Polaroid camera for my travels!

OK. Journal's first entry clocked.