Sometimes I wish I can just talk to that 15 year old boy and tell him SLOW THE FUCK DOWN. Why the fuck are you rushing to grow up. But of course. Sighs.
Me and my impatience.
Dapat henfon dari Jepun. Tapi sim card tak boleh masuk. So I Googled the fuck out of Internet to find a QUICK solution. I Googled stuffs back in stone age. Where they have this device yang ada wayar-wayar yang if I'm honest to God, nampak langsung tak convincing. But I didn't care. Because I wanna use the phone that I just got. And I wanna use it NOW. Aku cari dan cari dan cari. If I can find a way to cut the sim card I would do it. Tapi aku taktau susur galur, wiring sim card tu, kang kalau guna gunting, I wouldn't know what I cut and what I preserve.
End up rupanya phone zaman sekarang semua pakai jenis simcard baru, dorang panggil Micro ke mini simcard. Pfftt. So malam tu jugak, around 9 PM macam tu, aku terus start kereta pegi IOI Mall. Pegi counter Celcom. And da! Dah boleh pakai. Beli that micro simcard for 5 bucks. Lepas dah baya and tersengih macam haram, baru aku find out yang MEMANG ACTUALLY BOLEH POTONG SIMCARD tu. They have a mechanical device for that.
But for me and my impatience.
Dulu-dulu time nak kurus, I worked out through severe injuries and fevers and ended up melepek kat atas katil seminggu langsung tak boleh buat apa. Because why ? I am an impatien m**********.
And cerita nak kurus nie, over the past few years badan naik macam apa balik semula. Ever since that fateful accident. So in my own definition and in my own limitation, I have been working kinda hard to shed all these lemak. So despite baru keluar klinik gigi UiTM lepas extract a few gigi geraham. Yes a few. Aku rasa sakit gila **** nak mampus. The blood kept on running even after a few hours of biting hard at the gauze.
But you know what, sehari lepas tu aku berlari-lari kat atas elliptical machine dalam bilik aku. Because why kids ? That's right. Because I'm an impatient mofo.
By this time I should have known that it is OK to take your time, it is OK to go two steps back. What matters is that you ARRIVE.
Now because of my stupid impatience, I will have to cuti again before I can go into any serious workout. I should have learnt long ago that nothing good comes out of my impatience. If anything, it'll make things worse. And for sure, it blows right on my face again.
And being me, I know. It's just a matter of time before I go and langgar tembok dulu and ask questions later. I'm just that one mofo yang bila aku nak something. Aku nak sekarang. Sukar bagi aku untuk terima the fact that aku kena tunggu. For better of for worse. Aku nak sekarang.
And for that, I have. Almost always paid a hefty hefty price.