Dire State.

Am in dire state of need of My Old Self. Would I even have a look at what I've done to myself. Oh shit, please, please, please reincarnate The Self Centered, Obnoxious, Ignorant bastard I was.

Who the fuck are ya ? *looks in the mirror* Who the fuck are ya weepy whiny little Bitch ?

I hate you ! OMG !111 I hate Myself..

/me raises 2 middle fingers, commencing project "Obnoxiously Giving Not Any Flying Fucks v1.0"

Back In The Lab.
Nota Kaki : I'm back. (I wish)

Back in the Lab again. Trying to grasp the Reality of these seemingly Unreal occurrences that I have allowed to take place around Me. The breeze that wraps herself around me does not any longer sounds so convincing.

Light taps on my shoulder. " Hey Sir, I think I know what your problem is.. " says a faceless stranger, " What .. ? ", I blurted with certain uncertainty, " I know what your problem is Sir, you are, erm.. " He clears his throat while I'm still there pretty much dumbfounded waiting for his next projection of words, the dude's trying to be polite and all, I understand, but he's getting me all anxious now, and its all his fault. I was, for a few seconds, lost in my own tangle of riddles up in my head when he nonchalantly, not to mention catching me off guard, mentions " Lyfeless ! "

WHAT THE FUCKKK ? Are you serious ? " Yes, I am, but you, Sir, are in a more serious problem, you're in tight shit man, its like you've got your dick stuck in a virgin ass and the bitch is about take a dump man ! " LOL. The dude has got some serious academical flaws in making his point. But oddly enough, i get it. Crystal clear. Maybe its just because of the Assman I pretty much am.

The pieces of the Puzzle are scattered all over the edge of its platform. Detached pieces that have extracted the Me.exe substance from Myself.JPEG. Its time to peep at the BIGger Picture , Bitches. And i mean BIG. Period.

On the lighter, I might come back to this post, you know, elaborate a few details, minus all the intentional complexity in between, if your asses are lucky enough. But then again, i might not. What ? What ? Really ? Go ahead and sue me. Yea, yea, I'll be glad to see you in court.

A quick glance to the mirror, walked by, a few steps backward, I look again, this time wondering to myself : " Hey who the fuck is this Guy ? What the fuck is he doing there ?, Hello Sir, do i know you from somewhere ? Can I help you ? " Not only that he doesn't at all mind to mind me, it pisses me off even more when the Guy's actually Me. So yea, I smashed the mirror to a million shattered pieces and successfully bleed my knuckles in the process. I drag the dude out, so that we could have a little discussion verbally

Reality Check.

My swollen vision aches of teary eyes, never mind the pride at stake.
At least the sore bore the very price, price to keep me awake.
Body tattooed of battle scars, most of them from wars with myself within Me.
Never has it crossed my mind that I'd stand so formidable an Adversary.

I thought I'd beat Odds in the race of Contradiction,
with aids from the abundance of Steroid needles & Injections.
But caught gasping for air, when I finally saw Who's actually my opponent.
Irony beats me when I found out that I'm scared of my own reflection.

I dread at the crawling minutes that form the wheel chaired hours.
Dreading at the moments that should've been Ours.
Time tiptoed slowly than ever, Fuck all ye fake ticks on the clock !
Time too, has proven to me how easy she'd turn a Man to a Dork.
For in the course of hours, She'd easily kill him and glad doing the honor.
Hence, if these tears are measured in the form of seconds, I'd be a Goner.

The brutal massacre of Oneself with the approval of Consciousness, far from Subtle.
"Let me just sleep, for when I sleep, I dream. When I'm awake, everything seems so futile.."

"Let me just sleep, for when I sleep, I dream. When I'm awake, everything seems so futile.."

P/S : I Love You..
Current Listen : Maroon 5 - Won't Go Home Without You.mp3
Nota Kaki : I'm inspired..

The Past :

His eyes sored with hot tears steaming down a face that tires
Drops of them on his last enveloped thoughts & words for her
Petrified at the thoughts of leaving the world to Oblivion
Manages to somehow sculpture a broken smile thru his glass expression
However sad, butterflies are flying about in his abdomen
Excited about how she'll make new memories while framing the old moments
The tears, again an unnoticed company, roll on his cheeks again
This time sealing off his presence - away with his pain..

The Present :

She strays alone - in the vicinity of her thoughts, unalarmed.
This seems so Unreal, " He cant be dead yet, look, he looks so calm ! "
She didnt even spill a tear when the last sand covered his coffin
When she gets back, he's gonna put on the smile like he does often
Knocking on their door, " Hun, am homeeee.. " - to a No reply,
Smirking, she thought "One of yer silly tricks again huh, u Sly !"
"Just u wait.." she pretends getting upset, loving his fake repentance
The grass, the garden, they all look the same, only this time, he's absent..

The Verdict :

She trembles at the familiar sight of the handwriting, its his !
" I told u guys he isnt dead yet.. " her heart leaps in bliss
Fascinated, she strips away the envelope as quickly as she can
Without hurting the edges of the last thing that was touched by his hands
"The chicken scratch ! This must be his.. !", temporal joy filled her
Till the last 2 lines drag her back to Reality, one that drills her.

They read :

"By the time u read this letter, i probably am in the place faraway, watching above u.."
"Be glad there'll be no more pranks & bashes from me.. & P/S : I regret not having loved U.."

Copywritten 78ed.
Enthroned.

My mind orchestrates some phantom plots
While its physics derives of some random thoughts
My knuckle bleed & my fist still swinging
Even if i am on my buckled feet, my will - stinging.

My words travel the arc of universe
Without my lips having to part first
So what the fuck would happen if I decide to spit fire ?
Fuck torching my pieces, my eloquence'd lid vapours

Words with hell as the scale, remember your Sire's name
But u wont live to tell the tale, let alone acquire fame
Be glad your last word on earth was Raizzen
For it'd take a 1000 years to topple me after the first uprising

I'd step on carcasses with a smirk on my face
Decayed flesh'd only spark a thirst on my pace
So if u think u'd only find yourself in turmoils
Come & see me, I'll send ya back one with the soil..