The Grim Weeper

Following the post about the fugly fucker that imitated Jones' reaction during United's derby defeat. Here's my reply. Late, yes. But I savour my adversaries' defeat for a long long long time. I just found that out. Surprise surprise. I'm vengeful after all. So my apologies if I may have intentionally mislead you to think otherwise.

What ? Fucking what ?

We'll Remember

Don't worry. We'll remember this.

United - We Never Die

It was gonna happen. Sooner rather than later. United's run of games has been near flawless. Having watched United for years, I've come to be accustomed with sloppy runs and scrappy wins. A series of what unearthly fuckers haters would call, luck, but we'll get to that later. 

So as I was saying, having watched United for years, I've been so used to United last minute wins consisting of an endless 1-0 scoreline. Lucky calls. Fergie Association. Bla bla blah. Yada yada yada. This time, however, United have managed to pull wins, almost out of the hat even when playing like fucken shit 99% of the time. 

Perhaps I'd jinxed it. I was almost afraid because everything was going too well! And there it goes, my spidey sense had been true all along. The repeat of the 2010's exit from the Cup...

The ref just had to have the final say. The game was going so well and going in the direction of United. I almost couldn't believe my eyes as United wreaked havoc to a Real team fresh from inflicting 2 defeats in a row to the immaculate Barca, so to speak.

Just like it was in 2010, you can't help but feel robbed. Your team played so well against clear favourites, the ref just had to come and ruin it. I was bitter for a couple of days. But boy, am I proud. 

It will always be a question of "What if.." but there shall be no answer in that. The boys played their hearts out. Giggsy at 40 is just inhuman. How in the hell did he relive the heydays of his 20's and reverse the greys in his hair is anybody's guess. But they made me proud.

One of the most glaring flaw of United, one which is also the reason I hold United so dear to my heart is its ultra-attacking minded approach. Indoctrinated within the United genes, it dictates that they attack and attack even when down to 10 men with ruthlessness and vigor of a team who had burnt the bridges and would never go back. 

And for that I am proud, the bitterness gone. I now know that THE better team lost that night. 

That, if you aint too shallow minded to begin with, will answer why it was never really luck which has brought this fortune. It is simply the sheer hatred for losing and the never say die attitude.

United. We never die.

Padan Muka Kau

You know its hard to be graceful in the moment of glory. More so when the shit fuck faced opponents you beat is the disgrace of a shit club. A club of whom their fans talk like rights to glories is a divine right. Theirs. 

When in reality - or - if they're ever willing to get their heads out of the poop they get their heads so deep in. Theirs is a story inscribed in the pages of history textbooks. Ones students yawn upon just by a mere mention.

Yet, these pathetic scums will never shy away from reminding you that they're somehow the superior team. Always. Of course, this is a fact they will not admit out right. But what the fuck are you insinuating raising the 'five' sign whenever cornered ? 

And not to mention cornered due to the fact that you fail to keep your mouths shut in the moment of others' gloom. Spew craps all you want if you're top of the table. But when you're half way down there, don't bother talk shit because people will start to peep behind your doors wondering if your life is oh so perfect.

To me, and barring a few, Liverstool fans are.. Well doesn't matter.

I don't feel sorry for you. I won't. Whatever fucken shit you receive you deserve. So I wanna take this time out and wish the Liverstool fans, aside for a few exception to the rules - people around me - families, relatives and close friends who support Liverstool - Padan muka. 

With all those Howard Webb favouring United talks. He failed to produce Johnson with the second yellow for obstruction of a clear goal opportunity.

Ah malas aku nak pikir. Padan muka and fuck you. You deserve every inch of the humiliation because you fail to contain your mouths when it matters.

Hoyeah I'm happy. Beating you fair or not will always bring me a pleasure I will savour for days to come. And I simply want to rub this win on your face and I don't even want to bother sugarcoating it for your ears.

So hear it from me raw - Padan muka kau kalah. Tu la lengkali memekak lagi macam the chimpanzee that you are. Wargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh karg.

"Football, Bloody Hell!"

Sakit perut betul la tengok MU main. We played like shit for a large part of the game. Of course scraping wins such as this, they say, is a mark of Champions. But have some empathy for the guys like us, the fans who wish we could have kicked the ball ourselves but had to settle with kicking airs instead, out of sheer frustration. 

Sir Alex's selection to guard our suspect midfield is befuddling to say the least. Our whole gameplay looked lethargic. Yes, the midfield issue has been an open secret whole season long, in fact, 2 or 3 seasons back. But starting Giggsy and Scholes has made Newcastle looked like Barcelona when we know what we needed is energy and penetration against one of the more physically built team in the PL.

Of course I'm gushing with happiness with the win but 1 or 2 more games such as this, I'll probably have to get that insurance package from Anna sooner than I thought. Damnit United! 

"Football, bloody hell!"

Savoury

God, I'm such a slow slow starter. I'm still savouring, and as a matter of fact, savouring it more and more with each passing day ever since that match. THAT win.

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Tevez proving the cunt he is.

The win has got all the flavours a United fan could ask for. Beating the fucklots at their home. Tevez coming in and was initially thought a saviour only to eventually concede a freekick that prove to be the decisive moment for the derby match.

Also him coming in and quickly getting into the thick of things and acting in a direct proportion with the ugly prick he is, as quickly; kicking Jones, getting involved in heated face-offs and running like a headless chicken, as if winning could come with brawns alone.

And most fucken importantly United being United, leaving it late, coming back from behind and in the process got.. Can I get a drum roll here please ?

CITY FANS THINKING THEY COULD'VE SOMEHOW WIN THIS!!!

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You thought that for second, didn't you ? Didn't you ? Muahahahahahaha.

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Almost had you didn't we ? Wargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh

That right there, the moment when you had them in the clouds, only to snatch it away soooo late the game. That is the juice. Platinum gold right there.

Stupid fucken Ciddeh fans thinking that they could, within the smelly feet distance, sniff an unprecedented win, peg us one back right under our noses - or to the least - a draw - and that was of course until Robin Van Perfect hit it home. Thanks to Ciddeh's pathetic chief antagonist-somehow-pathetically-turned-saviour, Lord Ugly Tevez tripped Rafael's leg just outside the penalty box and gave United a freekick deep into the injury time.

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Another classic example why its not hard to hate these fuckers. Ciddeh, producing degenerates since inception.

"If RvP was to be asked where would he prefer to take his spot kick from, that couldn't have been to far" was the commentator's remark prior RvP's goal. And so it was, in what was to be one of the sweetest victory over our noisy noisy neighbours. 

And of course, how could have I commit such travesty and omit this.

Ciddeh was unbeaten on the Etihad ground over 38 games prior to the match. Pretty impressive stuff, I initially thought to myself, until the commentator added "stretched over 2 years" - pooffffffffffff - what the fuck - that was so funny, I almost peed myself. A Ciddeh fan listening to that must've been wondering what did he do wrong to deserve such condescending under-mine. Wakakakakakak. Even a neutral commentator feels fitting to take a dig at Ciddeh - albeit accidentally on his part.

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A cunt fans getting into a tussle with the stewards and policemen. What better way to bent your frustration than to a totally unrelated parties, right ?

United. Demolishing Ciddeh's hope since 2010.

Muahahahahahahahahahahahah.

Biasa Ah Fakhrol

I can't sleep after my usual 15-minutes nap-went-awry and midnite Nescafe (after more Nescafe during the day, not to mention). So what else. You thought of some bullshit that leads to another prolific bullshitism. 

So in relation to the first quote that I think classy, I thought of something better, if we're in parallel universe per se;

Porn is temporary, keras is permanent

Wakakakakakakakakakakak

I really need to get some sleep. Like seriously. Like dead serious. Like right now. OK now I'm gonna go do that serious face in front of the mirror.

OK I lied. Off to watch the newly downloaded Manchester derby match again. Weeeeee

The City Is Ours!

Yeah fucken right the city is yours. Where are all those yapping mouths when the derby's done and dusted ? United bought them referees ? You were lucky daddy was there to save your arse from further embarrassment. One clear goal disallowed and a penalty waived off. We bought the ref ? Fuck you. 

"Form is temporary, class is permanent" 

United. For life.

"Ajax Wipe The Floor With City"

What a nice fuckin sound to it. It doesn't get old that. "Ajax Wipe The Floor With City". I'm a fucken dumbo for not capturing the screen of the headline yesterday. Knowing fully well of headline rotation at ESPN Soccernet. Anyhoo, an Ajax fans' version of The Poznan (which btw wasn't City's to begin with, apparently there's a reason they called it THE Poznan, you fuckin cunts!) mocking these sad, pathetic plastics of fans will do. I mean, any fuckin Poznan other than those fuckards' disgrace of a club is always welcome. 

A club with NO history whatsoever, even their best celebration is the one copied from others.

Assfield Asswipes

From United to Liverstool. There's no love lost between these two. And though not much for my liking, the way we won last Sunday. I'd take any points off the Scouse bastards at Anfield any fucken' day. Fuck it if we had to win so ugly that we have to crawl our ways into a goal. And its always a pleasure beating you fucken' scums at your own ground, you ugly schmucks.

p/s: And oh by the way, for all your braggadocios and a sense of entitlement, how does relegation zone's oblivion treating you ? I hope its not too sunny for you hideous goblins down there.

Wargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh  kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh kargh.

Too Much Time In Your Hands

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What twat of a Gameweek. All my gambles fumbled. And fumbled pretty badly. Remember how I was foaming my mouth on how I wanna incorporate Hazard and retain Kagawa in the same team ? And remember how I was religiously preaching about how the smart guys always hold on to things that they seem to think will violate their intellectual beliefs, if they were to let go of those stuffs ?

I did just that.

I held on to Kagawa in false hope that Hazard will perform BAU (business as usual) and in the process I had to sacrifice the prolific Demba Ba and Ashley Cole.

This is how thing went the down. All the way fuck down.

Cashley Cole > Jenkinson - Cost: 0 | Return: 2 (+2)

Demba Ba > Sammy Amoebi - Cost: 4 | Return: 0 (-4)

McAnuff > Hazard - Cost:4 | Return: 3(-1)

And to top off a wonderful weekend, Ba scored 2 goals (acquiring 9 points in the process and tak masuk bonus lagi) and Cashley managed a clean shit (acquiring 8). That's a total of 17 had I not make those transfer. That's 17 + 5.

A total of 22 points lost due to my 'insightful' transfer policy. Chewah, transfer policy!

But this game is like surfing la bang, sometimes you went out and met a lot of waves unscathed, you go home feeling like champion. And other days you go home what the fuck happened, was I born a loser ?

If you're too twatted-up to make a decision, then all the fucks are on you. On the other hand, what I learn is, what I really really learn, is that throughout the course of the season some Gameweeks are gonna suck so bad you're gonna think there's something wrong with earth's gravity (sorry, just had to do it, the cheesy similes, else I wouldn't feel complete. lol). But if you hold on to a pretty much the same set of players, you're gonna see that these players DO accumulate points. Sure, there will be Gameweek where Ben Arfa scored 2 and streaks of when all Ba did was score 2 (damnit Ba!) but throughout the season, when the points have accumulated, I was tapping my temple last season, why the hell did I let go some of these top top players.

Thus, arriving to the learning curve, OK I forgot what I was gonna say. Happens a lot when you're typing on a whim. But, hold on to these players, Future Me, listen, hold on to them. Quick wins are alrighttttttt and sweettttttttt of course, but if one were to look at it from a bigger picture, you'll see that if you don't transfer around that much (thus costing you 8 points in the process EVERY.FUCKEN.TIME) - these players do score. And quite amazingly - when the dust settles.

So screw you.

Author's Note: Of course, coupled with the fact that Ferguson's rotation system proves just too risky for Fantasy Managers to incorporate United players in their team. RvP was a captain who were drawn upon for the final 20 minutes, how much could he do anyway. Kagawa didn't even play. So there you have it.

Fantasy Fantasized II

Rajah 1

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OK. Two Fantasy Football entries in a matter of days. Well I'm not officially obsessed, I was already obsessed ever since I can't remember;

(bullshit, you started playing Fantasy Football last season. Well OK fine - last season)

Ehem, pardon the little conversation between me and the little boy inside me a la Van Persie (yes! *fist pump*)

- Yes ever since last season.

Its just that I think it would help to keep track and rationalize why I did what I did and who I had to sacrifice in order for me to bring in other players, those whom I thought would definitely score some high points for me. And the spirits of time blows pretty strongly in one Eden Hazard's way. To miss the boat now would definitely spell a disaster and a lot of temple-hitting incidents comes May.

For instance, like last season, I knew RvP was gonna injure himself at some point into the season. Or rather, I was hoping that he would. I stubbornly held on to my players and and refused to accept the fact the hated Arsenal's forward was scoring points in abundance for Fantasy Managers.

My decision was based entirely on emotion and foolish hopes. And it cost me dearly. While other managers were enjoying RvP's captain points (double whatever the appointed captain for the Gameweek scores) I was left to pick up drizzles here and there due to the constant changes, for I am one "impulsive doer" and to a further extend, an impulsive decision maker. Funny, I constantly tweaked my team here and there and only refused to incorporate RvP. Simply out of my hatred for Arsenal.

That was up until a dude whom I deem (I wish I could've put this in a less awful manner) whom I deem intellectually less fortunate, told me "Hang tukaq ja RvP yada yada yada something something". Then it hits me, I was talking about this for a long long time; that the problem with intelligent guys is that they don't listen to things from a person whom they feel.. isn't smarter than them.

Then it hits me again, that Fantasy Football is a lot like stockbroking in a way that there are times you hold on to your stocks but doubt not, there will come a time that you will have to let go of some no matter how much it violates your intellectual beliefs.

Now a look into the last Gameweek, I didn't have to sacrifice anybody last week since Chelski didn't have any game in this Gameweek, its only logical that I bring in Ben Arfa as a replacement for Lampard. Shawcross for Rafael was an easy choice for that extra edge he brings to United's offense. So that's 4 points deducted.

I know Dong Ji Wu wouldn't be playing for Sunderland and I have had 4 points deducted already due to Ben Arfa's transfer - thus the question of should Ji be substitued since I have that extra dollars from Lampard's sale. The easy route would've been just to leave Ji in the team for even if he didn't play, I wouldn't lose 4 unnecessary points.

It wasn't up until the last minutes that I decided to use that "Baik Menyesal Beli Dari Menyesal Tak Beli" principle that I have always employed when faced against to-buy-or-to-bye predicament. Thus, the purchase of Steven Fletcher of Sunderland. I've admired the dude for his poaching tendency ever since his Wolves' days. But this was to be his first game for Sunderland and I know how much time some players take to settle within the team no matter how talented they are.

His was a risky buy due to the 8 points deduction. If I were to stick with Ji, yes, I wouldn't gain any points but I sure as hell would retain 4, but if I go for Fletcher, at the MOST logical he would conjure up 2 points and I would lose unnecessary 2 due to his transfer. Therefore in order for Fletcher's transfer to make sense he would've have to score at least a goal. And he gave me two! :)

Breakdown of points for my new transfer goes a little something like this;

1. Lampard > Ben Arfa - Cost: 0 | Return: 9 (+9)

2. Shawcross > Rafael - Cost: 4 | Return: 1 (-3)

3. Dong Ji Wu > Fletcher - Cost: 4 | Return: 13 (+13)

Total - Cost: 8 | Profit: 19 (+11)

Not bad.

OK that is some long ass entry.

We are finally arriving to the actual point of this (un)necessarily prolonged entry, for Gameweek 4, in order for me incorporate Hazard, I have to sacrifice a player of his caliber or or two players; one of entry and another, intermediate class players.

The initial plan looked like this, but since RvP's hatrick heroic last night I think to drop him now would be stupid as I have already bought him up and considering how he will be heavily utilized by United in the upcoming fixtures now that Rooney the Shrek has got himself injured. And to buy him back would mean MAJOR tweaking to the team as he's the single player to cost the managers around 13 mil ++ and will potentially be blown more out of proportion as the season winds down.

That would mean the logical choice is to sacrifice Kagawa and another fringe player. Kagawa, to my dismay, hasn't performed up to the standard I expected of him, but to drop him now might be a little premature since perhaps he has yet to settle to life in the Premier League. This is largely credited to his small physique. Though it has to be said that the signs are there. And United's Gameweek 4 is at Old Trafford and there's every chance he would score or at least make a couple of assists.

Thus, to cut the story short and quite frankly, because I have even bore myself - I have to sacrifice the excellent Cashley Cole and Demba Ba :( in order to make room for Kagawa to stay and for Hazard to play. And the fringe player I brought in of whom, is as sure as the stars in the sky, isn't gonna play; Sammy Amoebi. (sila rujuk Rajah 1)

But that's beside the point, managers bring in lesser players they knew aren't gonna play a single game for them all the time due to the tight budget constraint. The trick is to find a fringe player who might've caused a sudden impact, for instance, last season - Bossingwa.

OK. Stay tuned - because I know I won't.

Fantasy Fantasized

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My Gameweek 4 Fantasy pipe dream. I'll just put it on hold for a while (the only worry is that price will go up again) for I tend to rush too many things that when I look back.. Well, that's another matter for another day.

Pieces.

I Remember The Mockery

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RvP spent all but 20 minutes on his debut at Everton in a Red shirt. This was what the ingenious Arsenal fans have had to say. Not match fit. Barely formed an understanding with his new peers. These were the mockeries laid for both United and Persie.

Yep, United did lose the match, make no mistake, its painful to watch, what more with the struggle me and Apis have had to endure just to watch the match as it was Kuala Kangsar on the eve of Eidulfitri at 2.30 o'clock in the morning, there was no mapley whatsoever to help the situation.

But here we are 2 matches-old into the season, Arsenal remains unbeatable and on the contrary, United had already lost once. How in the name of logic has United got more points than the mighty Invincibles ? I am yet left to ponder on the 8th wonder. I told you I will keep score and I will remember all the insults. Simply so that I could rub them on your face when the winds blow south of my ways.

:)

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More on deluded Arsenal fans later. For now lets roll on to the good times.

"This Is Our Year! ™"

With all those talks. All those craps you spew. Liverstool still aint shit. The most loudmouthed residents of foulmouthsville. This is our year. And yet again This is our year the next season. And you still ain fucken shit.

MFA

Signing off for the night from the number one Malaysian state, car registration number wise.