On Hold

Project Workout has to be put on hold for a bit coz I think I may have injured myself. If experience has taught me anything in the past, rushing things out, pushing yourself when you're supposed to let nature take its course and let it heal will almost always bring about negative consequences. 

Back then when I was chasing my 'ideal' weight I will always push through the pain, you thought you were being persistent when you're just being an idiot. It always ended up in a extended, prolonged duration of hiatus. Totally unnecessary if I would have just listened to what my body was telling me.

Today my body is telling me that there's a stabbing pain whenever I climb down the stairs (just weird its not climbing up), so I will listen to it. But not too long please.

Now I have to reshuffle my schedule to negotiate my way past this injury. Two more workout sessions pending in April Week 4.

Sighs. Rainy days. Lazy days. 

:)

After the super busy finals week where as mentioned in prior entry, high intensity workout is just too taxing, I went 4 days without working out. Hence, Project Workout was at risk of being another one of those in the long lines of projects to be labelled 'Work In Progress'.

I could be happy with myself alas, with just 3 days to spare to enter April's Week 4, I managed to meet the minimum target of at least working out 3 times in a calender week. 

Hence the Project Workout Schedule now looks a little bit more like a progress journal.

So now tonite am gonna stuff my tummy with stuffs I will probably regret 2-3 days from now.

Viva la Revolución!

After a couple of weeks of living like reclusive hobo battling last minutes assignments and a truckload of, semester worth of formulas in one night, I can finally see the rays of sun shining through my bedroom window again. I am finally ready to rejoin the human population.

So here's a few things I plan to do today:

1. Clean my room

2. Clean the hamsters' room

3. Workout

4. Assemble some Gundam backlog

But.

I will probably do none of those things and instead, will sit on my ass daydreaming about stuffs and toys I wanna buy next but will probably end up buying tomorrow. And I will probably plan about planning things I wanna plan next.

Viva la Revolución!

PKR Dungu

Heheh. Am still up because tomorrow there's a paper called Banking Operation which basically is just non stop tirades about banking activities in Malaysia from the fixed depo sampai la MIDF. Just to belagak and show off terms I just come to know after 3 to 4 months worth of semester :D

I've covered pretty much 3.5 - 4 past year paper. So now am feeling all confident. Bajet boleh lepas. In Sha Allah. Will cover a little bit more I guess but now my tummy is drumming war songs and I think Megi would be the most viable source of energy but I have been quite strict with my nocturnal diet of late, limiting mouth exercises to only one fruit worth of carb per night. Malam ni langgar habis dah sebab Mak masak dalca kari terbaik dari ladang. But I figure its OK since I'll be up until late. Who knew when you're 'up until late' you get into another cycle of hungriness.

Btw the title of the post is totally unrelated. Anyway I have been seething against PKR for quite some time now but lately I think they're getting dumber and dumber. Kalau dah bodoh. Research results dengan personal opinion pun tak boleh nak beza. Heheh.

Ingat nak reply je tadi but since I have promised myself to stop these petty campaigns against the tak-boleh-diselamatkan I'll just post it in my blog then. My personal blog. My personal opinion.

Earth To Fakhrol

This here is another vicious cycle of lazi-ass-ness. 

I have been too preoccupied with the preparations of my examinations. Therefore, high intensity workout just will not do since it taxes too much of energy for me to even stay awake during the burning of the midnight oil. I am fucking tired. Even now I can still feel the weariness, residue of mentally and physically going all out. Alas, the fate of last minute study warriors. A spent force. But you still have to keep going.

I NEED to do it today and tomorrow if I were to follow my meticulously-lah-sangat planned workout schedule.

But as always. I hate it. I dread every fucking minute of it.

But the Positive Fakhrol keeps reminding me that I can edit this post after.

I guess that helps a little bit. Knowing that you can journalize the experience. Both the resenting of the workout and the feeling of doing it anyway. 

I'll see you in 30 minutes time. Or another 3 years, if procrastination got in the way.

Go go Last Minute Study Warrior!

Talking To Myself

Me: God I hate working out. 

This is the exact fear that I had before restarting with this high intensity training. I know that the first few weeks I will be doing fine and it will all look up and maybe I will even entertain the thoughts of me being consistent with a workout regime. 

Three weeks into the (basically) new fitness regime. 

The same thing. This familiar, dreadful feeling. 

First I put it off, dari lepas balik office ke lepas maghrib. Now its 9.13 PM and I still haven't started anything yet. 

I hate it I hate I hate it.

Fakhrol Yang Positif : OK, as a bonus. I'll let you edit this post when you're done with the workout. 

Me: Why would I want that ? Pfft

Edit: Whoever the fuck said that its gonna get easier with every workout is a damn fucking liar. I did it. 20 minutes of hellish hell. If people see me they're going to think that my shirt was soaked in sweat when its actually made of 95.6% unadulterated tears. - MFA

Save Moi

Gosh I really need to curb down my spending on these 'hobby' craps. Every time I see a Tamiya or a Gundam ad I have this uncontrollable urge to click click click. But I just.....

Its one of those things you've had to hold yourself from when you were a kid. You want this and you want that and you can never really have it because it was not financially prudent for your family to trade a plate of nasik goreng so that you can have an Ultraman figure, so to speak. My family's not exactly 'poor' poor but we aren't rich either. My father used to drive a cab back then aside from his post office job (yeah, I never knew what he really did in his younger days in Pejabat POS, when I asked he said he never was a postman but rather he delivers letters by vans, but lets just keep that part for another day) and my mom worked as an information assistant at our old, beloved airport Terminal 1. I think its safe to say that we were the perfect example of a lower middle class family during those glorious booming Malaysian economics.

I remember one day I saw an Ultraman figure I think it was RM 6.00 or RM 12.00. So I never really get my way during those days and you've learnt to just accept that your family can never really afford it (or can they ? I guess I'll never know) so you just ask once and you're 99% sure its never going to be affirmative but you asked anyway. But where I went to school from my standard one to five in Kampung Tunku, PJ (1991-1995) the brats there were made of mostly upper mid to upper class income families and I've heard stories from my friends if they would have just stood their ground, eventually their parents would give in and buy them those toys they want, just to get them away from the toy shelves. And so I did. Not only that it didn't work, I was a little embarrassed that my father would scold me there and then. Adoi malunya. That was the first and last time I ever tried to pull those rich kids tactic. Tahi la. Dengan family aku tak jadi punya!

So when you're working and these things from your olden days, things you once had but was too stupid to hold on to and somehow damaged it beyond repair, things you totally had no idea what happen to. And most importantly things you MAY NEVER HAVE in your capacity as a kid back then. So when these things appear right before your eyes and you know, now, though not filthy rich, it is still within your financial capacity to get, mata jadi buntaq semua nampak semua nak. Homaigod its so not healthy. Yesterday I resolved to control my spending more and right after I bukak Instagram this bugger said in his ads "The last of the Hublot wristwatch stock. Lepas nie tak restock dah" and despite the years in you, you get influenced by these things. So despite my staunch resolution to curb down my spending to only planned stuffs and essentials. I went ahead and contacted the seller and bought the wristwatch. 

I whispered to myself "The last wants spending for the month" and bukak FB nampak orang jual Tamiya yang memang ada dalam mental wishlist. I straight away went and private messaged him. 

Though all these spending have got to do with my uncapped desires and wants, one of the truer reason I click click click at all these ads are the fear that they will forever disappear in the market hence I lost the chance to hold a piece of that beautiful childhood era forever. Wow that somehow came out pretty poetic.

To wrap, yeap I really need to curb down these spending sprees by:

1. Narrowing them down to planned purchases ONLY. Never settle. If the item is not reachable at the moment. Leave. Don't get a compensatory, slightly similar product just to console my buying urge because I'll end up getting what I originally want eventually. Sometimes paying bloated prices. Fuck!

2. Realize that these things, despite its ages, are available. ALWAYS. You just have to know where to look and the budget. By running rampant with my finance I blow away the money that could have been put aside for the original stuffs therefore I end up getting more secondary stuffs which are of course a welcome but not the wanted destination.

I guess break ups really bring out the nerd-ism in all of us. Gundams. Star Wars. Batman. Tamiya. And I wanna have all of 'em. 

Somebody save me.